The B's gave you that point so they can kick your ass in the playoffs

Last night's game was a little redonk, but in a good way. They B's showed they are the tougher, better, and believe it or not classier team (see when O'Byrne turtled like a bitch after he bumped Thornton).

Yes, the B's may be a little rough around the edges, a little raw, and yes one has a fumanchu, but they out classed the Habs in every way last night. (Yes, Looch got a little out of hand last night, but who wouldn't want to give Komo a little face wash?)

Player of the game for me? Lil Patty. He really found his game last night. He was a bad ass and played beautifully. Maybe buzzing his shiny, girly, Quebec, hair brought him back to life.

Favorite Moment of the Night? Reading Thornton's mouth as he yelled to a terrified O'Byrne in the next penalty box over. I'm pretty sure it had notes of, I'm going to fucking kill you, You're dead, etc. Hnidy is brandishing a shiv for Thornton for the next match up so he can make good on his promise. I've missed you the past few games my friend.

I don't have much more as I am in a bit of mourning this morning for the Catamounts, although I'm proud of their effort. I leave you with some words.


A word to Special Jack:
Refer to the picture above. I don't know how you would "toboggan" as a child, but this really doesn't relate. A conga line 'o fight would be more appropriate. Also, I have taken 6 years of Latin, got a 780 in verbal on my SATs and I still had to look up a word you used last night. I still love you in your own "special" way though.

And finally a word to NESN:
I have a rant coming up, reminiscent of when I told you to go fuck yourselves last year. Pretty much consists of the same content, but I plan to make it a tad bit more mean this time around. Stay Tuned.

While the Bruins are on Spring Break...

Since the B's have a 10 week break between games right now (and then finish up the season playing almost every other night), I've been able to focus my attention on other games. And last night was a good night to start. It looks like the B's not only proved their Eastern Conference dominance, but set Marty on a shaky course. Flyers owned the Devils, 4-2, last night which is much needed due to the fact the B's can't make the distance between them and NJ til the weekend. While the Bruins have one of the shorter schedules left, this week will see the other teams like NJ playing catch up and will be pretty even with games left by Saturday.
Panthers beat Hurricane's with a score of 4-2 last night and are now tied with the Habs for 8th. But as it stands, Habs win the tie breaker. I swear Gillette bought some points in January when no one was looking. How can such a sucky team still be in it? Florida plays Philly tonight, Habs play Atlanta. Hopefully the Thrashers can muster only a little suckiness tonight so the Habs will be suckier than them. Bottomline is, Panthers win and Habs lose tonight, Habs are FINALLY out of the top 8.
B's catch a flight from Cancun on Friday to face the Leafs on Saturday. Let's hope they shake off their tans and hangovers enough to start making that gap between themselves and the Devils a chasm.

Lesser of evils

Although my interest in the playoffs has diminished quite a bit, my love for hockey overall keeps me paying attention. It's also boring to have no one to root for, so I am going to root for Pittsburgh. Why you ask? Because I hate them the least.

Detroit: Detroit is like that really hot girl in your dorm in college who all the guys loved and didn't gain the freshman 15, the kid in calculus who ALWAYS knew the answers and stifled giggles when someone said, "I still don't get it", and meathead jock who won all the awards and got all the tail, rolled into one mass of obnoxiousness. And Babcock getting a nod for the Jack Adams? Really? I could have coached that team to Cup. But by all means, if you are the kind of sports fans who roots for Tiger Woods, The Yankees, etc, whose gear is readily available in stripmalls across the US, then the Red Wings are for you.

Dallas: If Ribeiro was on fire, not only would I not piss on him to help put it out, but I'd throw an 8 month old Christmas tree soaked in propane on him. Enough said.

Philadelphia: Steve Downie, Jesse Boulerice, Randy Jones, Scott Hartnell, Bobby Clarke. All a bunch of thugs who don't deserve to play the game.

Pittsburgh: Fairly non offensive. Has hockey's golden boy who happens to remind me of Andy Samberg whom I love. They were also featured on Sudden Death . Any team that shows up in a Jean Claude Van Damme movie can't be bad, right? Although I occasionally get flashbacks of Ulf and Jagr and start to twitch a bit...

So there you go folks. Pittsburgh is the least offensive team left in the the playoffs. So I give them a half hearted, Go PENS!
In the meantime, I encourage Sidney to keep up with the shirtless photo shoots. His man/boy pecs are oddly enough appealing to me.

Who gets married in April anyway?

So not only am I still sick, but I need to put on a pretty little party dress and act happy for a wedding that dares to take place during this oh so important game. I have to smile and congratulate the happy freakin couple all the while thinking, you are making me miss my game you jerks. And its not even open bar.

Anyway, thanks to DVR, by the time I watch the game, it will probably be over. I pray that I can avoid the score until then.

Final thoughts: The Bruins are doing everything right. They are shooting, scoring, and Timmy T is the man. All they need to do is keep it up and pray that the Habs stay in whatever rut they are in right now.

On the injury front, hopefully they'll rush back Koivu who will be more of liability than a boost. Doesn't look like Bergy's going to play. That's for the best. He's still aboot 7lbs below playing weight. All signs point to Ward playing however. He is such a rock for them, it will be great to get him back on the blue line. Other than that, I see no need for change from the other night. Oh, and keep Phil in! He got the message. Loud and clear.

Also, win or lose, I hope that all Bruins fans act like decent human beings. I was disgusted to read about the drunk retard who beat up the Habs fan. While you never want the opposing fans to feel at home in your house, feeling the need to kick the shit out of them goes beyond bad sportsmanship. This O'Brien character obviously sucks at life (another sign other than the beating is that he was wearing an Allison Jersey) and I hope karma gets him back ten fold.

All I can say to my boys now is, Good Luck, Keep your head up, and Get some goals. I'll see you on the other side.

And the Thunder Rolls....

And we have finally, FINALLY, seen Price shaken and downright suck. I was beginning to wonder if that is possible. Sobotka is still wondering if the final goal last night really happened. This should give the B's a huge boost going into Saturday's game, but kids, this is FAR from over.

The B's have a huge feat ahead of them. But all signs point to the fact that is IS possible. This is a far cry from the sentiment before Game 1. I'm not going to lie, I was just hoping the B's would win one freakin game against that Habs. But oh, how the tides have turned.

And a word of advice. This blog exists because of our Pepe who meant the world to us and instilled a love for the Bruins in all of his grandkids. Although he is not with us anymore, every time I watch a game or think about the Bruins, Pepe is with me. And there are two things I remember that he has said about Hockey that has stuck with me the most:

1- Pavel Bure has the prettiest lips he has ever seen. (That picture up top makes sense now huh? And tell me you don't agree!)

2- NEVER bother God with prayers about Bruins. He has bigger things to deal with.

Well Pepe, I have always kept God out of hockey. And last night, while strolling the Habs blogs to see what they thought of this game, I came across a comment calling Carey Price, Jesus Price. Ouch... Now my fiance is the biggest Habs fan around, but also a devout Catholic. As soon as I told him that he got a little nervous.

Whether you report a higher power or not, keep hockey prayers, comments, out of the ears of the big guy. He's got wars, famine, plauge, etc. to contend with. Bugging him with hockey will just piss him off. Remember he is a loving God, but a vengeful God. However, all Habs fans, feel free to pray away....

Enough for cliches, Garth Brooks, and sappy memories today. The stress of this series has made me sick, so I am taking a PTO day today. I must rest to cure my aliments and get ready for Saturday.
More tomorrow.

WHY I HATE NESN AND THE RED SOX...even more than the Habs

The Red Sox are playing the Yankee's tonight. The world must stand still. Everyone must stop what they are doing and pay homage because the Red Sox are playing the fucking Yankees. Who knows when that may happen again???????? Oh wait, it will happen about 3 million more times over the course of this summer.

So why I ask you would NESN even THINK of bumping the Bruins biggest game of the year to another channel which people may or may not get? And not only THINK of doing it, but actually do it? NESN. You know, I thought you stood for New England SPORTS Network. Not Never Ending SOX Network. You suck. You suck at life.

So here's to you Nesn. Here's to all the red faced, fat, obnoxious Red Sox fans who would rather watch Manny pick his ass in right field tonight than watch a real game. I wish upon the Red Sox another 80 years without a World Series win. I wish upon you embarassing losses against the Yankees. Maybe if NESN pretends to support the Bruins, the rest of Boston will too and we won't see 10 fucking million Habs fans in our own rink.

And Red Sox fans, if you suddenly realize you'd like to see real atheltes compete, the Bruins will be on NESN Plus. Who knows what channel that is, but I'm sure by the time you find it, the game will be over anyway.

Now, I must go burn my Varitek Jersey, gather with the 12 other real Bruins fans in the world, and pray with all of our might that the B's show up tonight to save their season despite the utter disrespect they are shown in their own sports community.

USE THE FORCE LOOCH

The next Cam Neely, you are. Come to restore balance in the hockey universe, you have. Strong with you, the force is. Use the force wisely Looch, you must. If you beat the Habs, destroy the dark side, you will.

Seriously though, enough Yoda. But this is as Star Warsy as it gets. A little scrappy rebellion trying to take down an huge dark empire with a young warrior emerging as their future leader. Just like Star Wars, however recast with the B's.

-Looch, the young Padawan learner, as Luke Skywalker
-Timmy Thomas, the steady sidekick, as Han Solo
-Savard, the little bot coming in clutch, as R2-D2
-Aaron Ward, the mechanical wonder that some how shakes off his 42 injuries, as C3PO
-Thomas Plekanec, the little girl, as Princess Leia (hey, his shitty play is technically helping the Jedi Cause)
-Zdeno Chara, the calm, yet sometimes fierce beast, as Chewy.
-The rest of the team can be Ewoks because they are just so freakin cute.
-Julien, enough said, as Master Yoda
-Cam Neely, training his young Jedi Apprentice to become the fierce warrior his was/is, as Obi-Wan Kenobi

As long as the B's continue to steer away from the darkside, they can win these games. The darkside is getting weak. If anything, the Habs have stolen these games (with the exception of Game 1) from the B's. Keep grinding, and the wins will come. Just a winning tomorrow night will be enough to send the Habs ambitions out the window faster than Mace Windu. As they penetrate the Death Star tomorrow night, they need to remember that while the Empire's army is great, a small, concentrated attack will be enough to set off the destruction of the whole ship. Hit em' hard and make it count. Once great, evil republics have been taken down before. Just ask Kovy, maybe that will bring back some (any) emotion.
Win, the B's must and will.

Can History Repeat?

I remember it well. April 2004. I was sitting in Houston's with some coworkers, watching the Habs beat the B's in Montreal. While the B's were still up 3-1 in the series, an uneasy feeling came over me. This particular series was especially intense for me. I was working as an intern for the Bruins and had been at every game and every Bruins event for that season. The chance of the Habs going on to win the series was impossible, right?
It was an unseasonably hot day in Boston when the B's lost the series in game 7. It was Patriot's Day. Spent the day drinking beers on Boylston, watching the runners in the Marathon go by. Hours later, I was standing in the Fleet watching the impossible slowly turn to reality. The B's were out. Upset by the lowly Habs and that dumb fuck Ribeiro. As the end of the game ticked by, I was praying that someone would just take that fuckers head off and at least give him a reason to stay on the ice. But no one did. And the B's season was over.

And now, 4 years later, can the B's find redemption? Can history repeat itself? Can a comeback so unlikely happen again between two teams? Julien has played the role of the master maestro, turning this team into a contender. If a B's team ever had a chance to do this in recent history, this is the team.

Couple Things

Tonight. Big game. Huge game. The series will be tied up, or the B's will be down 3-1, which only a handful of teams have ever returned from to win a series.

1. Shawn "Edgecrusher" Thornton will need to watch out. The refs are eyeing him like a little retired couple watches the hippy that just moved in across the street. They have their little notebook where they note his movements, vehicles entering his driveway, and just how many frisbee catches in a row his dog named Piper can make. Play the game hard, and don't let Steve Begin-inning to look like a pile of wet leaves get on your nerves. Yes, it would be nice to relegate him to wheelchair status, but he's not worth it.

2. Don't be distracted by the Flying Brothers' Kostitsyn. Yes, their trapeze act is fun to watch, but at the end of the day, you'll be sunburned, have too much cherry slurpee in your stomach, and you'll be out $56. Hopefully Cirque du Soleil will finally get back to them and they'll leave the Habs to fulfull their lifelong amibition of wearing brightly colored tights.

3. Watch Mike "I Wish I Was Drafted By The B's" Komisarek. He's been playing to hurt someone. I think Axie should go for an old time hockey hip check and knock this freak flying. He'd never expect it.

4. Whatever Lucic ate before the last game, it worked. I'm thinking that Metropolit spiked his food with GHB, or perhaps some pharmaceuticals normally reserved for racehorses. I thought I heard "HI HO SILVER AWAY!" several times throughout the last game, but I could be mistaken.

5. Chara needs to keep his anger up. If they slash him, he should give them a facewash that will clog their pores for years to come. If they hit him, he should palm their head, give a sharp twist, and summarily end a career.

6. Watch for acorns and beechnuts that Simon Stunt Double Suckmy Koivu will be throwing on the ice from up high. They could tweak a knee or turn an ankle.

7. If there's a scrum in front of the net, keep an eye on Comrade Kovalev. Word on the street has it that he has a dagger (with a sickle and hammer on the hilt) strapped to his right forearm. He is KGB trained. Use extreme caution.

8. Continue to channel the passion and toughness of so many Bruins past...Robby Dimaio, Stan Jonathan, PJ Stock, Dougie Doull, and the ultimate, Cammer Bammer. If you catch a high stick, spit your fragmented teeth into their eyes and keep playing. Apparently the refs aren't calling high sticks on the Habs anymore, so feel free to take it into your own hands.

9. Sturm will find the net tonight. He's been skating like a V2 rocket all series, and it will pay off.

10. GET SOME TRAFFIC IN FRONT OF THE NET. Put Edgecrusher on a line with Savvy and Looch. Put him in front of the net. Zip shots at him. Maybe one will deflect off his stick, leg, or face. Either way, it's a goal. Count it.

11. Thornton, as well as Reich, have been playing outstanding hockey. It's refreshing to see a coach that will award icetime to the muckers and grinders in the playoffs. Kessel would be well served to watch the way that Sobotka played last game. Phil, we know you can skate fast. We get it. It's gotten to the point where other teams know exactly what you do. You're like the friend that we used to play NHL 94 against. You have one move (go outside, fast). It works once or twice. After that, EVERY TIME, you're going to end up on the ice, writhing around, with copious amounts of your blood and brain fluid leaking out.

12. Come out fast, hard, and aggressive. Get out there and spread some hate and discontent. Don't suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder; go out and cause it.

Enough said. Get some.

Game 4: Who Wants It More?

Les Glorieux? Ole, Ole, Ole? Seems a bit much, but I have to say that I am jealous of the passion Montrealites have for their team. Over the past decade or so, Bostonians lost their passion for the Big Bad Bruins. The Bruins had a few bad years, there is a lot of animosity toward ownership/management, and the world began to revolve around the loud, obnoxious mass which is Red Sox Nation. However, times they are a changing.

The Bruins are back. They are something to be proud of. You've got the ultimate underdog, Tim Thomas, playing his heart out and becoming the titanium spine of this Bruins team. You've got Milan Lucic. A kid. A prospect that was supposed to go back to Juniors at the beginning of the year. Now, a Seventh Player Award winner, a fan favorite, he epitomizes all that is Bruin. A mix of grit, skill, heart, intensity, and power.

And now, you look to management. Who do you see? Cam Fucking Neely. This man is passion. He is hockey. He is so hungry for a cup and for the Bruins become the the team they once were. Anyone who saw Neely's reaction to Savvy's OT winner Sunday night has no doubt he wants to win so bad he can taste it. And yes, it is confirmed that both of Chiarelli's hands were broken in that exchange. How could you not get behind this?

I know it will take time, but I hope over the years the new Garden will become the Garden that Guy Carbonneau remembers. When recently asked if he felt the same intensity in the newer building he claimed that it was intense, but in the old Garden would not be teaming with Habs fans. In the old Garden, they wouldn't dare show up in their jerseys.

While Sunday was a great day. It is done. A game in the books and tonight is just as important as Sunday. Julien will probably keep the roster the same as Sunday. There really isn't a ton to improve on and all lines gave a fierce effort in the win. Bergy is not ready to go. He needs more practice, more weight. He can't get much going by the way of getting into game shape when all recent practices have been morning skates. Also, would he F up the Mojo? Yes, his return would be emotional, glorious. But boys out there have found their groove. They should keep digging in as long as it works for them. Kessel, What? and Alberts should remain out. They are both young. They will have their time. Wideman was huge for the B's on Sunday, and again, the lines worked for them. No reason to change it up. They just need to play like they believe they'll win.

Cheesy theme song for tonight? Don't Stop Believing. If the B's play with the passion Steve Perry sings, this game will be theirs.

Game 4, Bobby Orr

A few nights ago, Game 4 seemed like it was probably going to be an elimination game. Bruins sucked Game 1 and lost. Played their asses off in Game 2 and lost. What the hell was it going to take to win? Where the Habs unbeatable? Answer: No. Habsolutely not. (sorry). Game 3, they found it. They found their way to a win. Outstanding play by Timmy T. All 4 lines contributing. Rust finally shook off of Savvy and Milan Lucic will be a name Hab fans remember. And Peter Schafer? WTF? Looks like he just came out of a hockey coma. The hits were hard, momentum fast, and the B's played a solid game.
However, history that game is.
Game 4 is all that exists in the Bruins' world now. They have found their groove and need to keep the foot on the accelerator.
Keys to Game 4 win

• Timmy T. Keep it up. And I believe he will. Timmy feeds off of this shit.


• Keep your hits hard. Habs out hit the B's in game 1. Bull shit. Should never, ever happen.


• Keep Kovy out of it. Alexei looked a bit like the tired, bored Kovalev of years past.


• Keep shooting! The B's are actually pulling the trigger more consistently. Keep it up! Price has to crack, he's got Garth Brooks on his helmet for fucks sake. Get in his face, and keep the shots coming.


• Watch out for the Habs 4th (yes, 4th) line. Kostopolous and Co. seems like the only Habs who want to win right now.


• Remember, you beat them! Finally, the monkey is off your back. Keep playing your asses off. Redemption will come.