I mean seriously, we know our team is good, having just won the Cup and having made minimal roster changes, but what the fuck is going on?
It all starts at the back end, where St. Timmy of Thomas got his TENTH STRAIGHT WIN last night. I mean seriously, what the fuck is going on? The entire team is feeling it and it's just amazing to watch.
In a VERY entertaining hockey game last night, the Bruins made the Penguins their bitch. Imagine how frustrating it must be for guys like Crosby and Malkin to actually make their way through what looks like thirteen layers of defense, only to have the entire net bricked off by Timmy. They had some good chances, and Timmy was there every single time (Cooke goal aside, which Timmy had pretty much no chance on). #30 is playing just beautiful hockey right now. He is making everyone else look like a bunch of no-talent assclowns and his numbers look fake.
-I want to know what Crosby and Krejci were talking about. Not that it would happen, but the gloves getting dropped would resemble two three year olds fighting over the same Transformer toy. Krejci can't fight and Crosby flails like a drowning woman. I would have been laughing like a retard eating Pop Rocks.
-Johnny Upchuk looked like Ray Bourque putting shots on net. How? They were low, accurate, HARD and there were about thirty of 'em. Bourque had the ability to get the shots through time and time again, and Johnny was obviously channeling him last night. I'm kind of glad he didn't score though, because everytime Jack Edwards says "Johnny Rocket", all I can think of is a dog rolling around with a boner. Red rocket, Sparky, red rocket!!
-I get my own red rocket going when a frustrated team starts taking runs at Bruins players, or lo and behold, gives Timmy an extra whack or two. The Pens are just the latest team to find out that you don't want to wake up the Bruins, and you ESPECIALLY don't want to give Timmy a whack on the glove hand when he's covering the puck. He hunts fucking bears in the offseason, so some turd in an opponent's uniform really doesn't stand a chance. Campbell's fight was a good one. Both landed several big punches and it was a good bout.
-Last night showed, YET FUCKING AGAIN, that the Bruins can do it either way. To all teams that are going to be playing the Bruins: pick your poison. You can try outskating the boys and going the skill route, but you're going to lose. When your "4th" line has guys like Thornton, Campbell and Paille, I'm honestly not too concerned about matching lines with the other team. The Pens have two of the best players in the NHL in Bitch Pants Crosby and Malkin, and they did exactly fuck all last night (unless you count Crosby running into his own player and Malkin taking a thundering hit from Cheddar Bob Paille as something). If you want to go the physical route, well, they got that covered as well. So go ahead and give it a whirl, but it's not going to end well for you.
The boys are in Winnipeg tonight and I'm thinking Tuukka will get the nod. The last game with this team was entertaining, and I'm hoping the boys can keep it going. What a streak...my god, the red rocket is coming back.