My head is still spinning from last night's game.
Up 2 to 1. Blow the lead. Push them to OT.
And then about two fucking seconds in, Chompers beats Timmy, who was on some sort of expedition to the far boards.
So many things are going through my mind, but there are children in the world. OH WAIT, IT'S MY FUCKING BLOG.
-WHEN THE FUCK DID YOU BOYS FORGET HOW TO HIT? THE GODDAMN CANUCKS WERE PLASTERING YOUR ASSES ALL OVER THE ICE! LOOCH, HORTON, WAKE THE FUCK UP AND USE THOSE HUGE BODIES THAT THE SICK LORD BLESSED YOU WITH! AND HORTON, IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO SHOOT THE FUCKING PUCK, AT LEAST PUT SOME LUMBER ON THEIR TEETH!
-CHOMPERS SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN SUITED UP FOR THE GAME, BUT THE MOTHERFUCKING PUSS-ASS FUCKING NHL DECIDED NOT EVEN TO FINE THAT FUCKING ASSCLOT. WHAT'S THE FUCKING DEAL WITH THAT? FUCK HIM AND HIS WEAK ASS PLAYOFF BEARD AND THOSE FAR APART MONGOLOID EYES! HEY CHOMPERS, MAYBE SOMEONE CAN SCHEDULE A PLAYDATE FOR YOU AND CORKY KABERLE AND YOU CAN MAKE SOME FUCKING BROWNIES IN HIS EASY-FUCKING-BAKE OVEN.
Deep breath.
I grinned happily when I saw the replay of Rich "Paul Bunyan" Peverley chopping down Bieksa. Fine, NHL. You want to let Chompers play, well we got your apples right here.
The hockey gods have smiled upon my pasty ass, and I'll be at the game tomorrow night. I'm sure the boys will be glad to play in their rink and Rene will do his part to get everyone pumped up. I'll be doing my best to make that place as fucking hostile as possible. And if I see those stupid fucking green dudes, they're going to learn just how it feels to shit spandex after having it unceremoniously stuffed up their asses.
Let's win this one...
Go B's.
No comments:
Post a Comment